My Case

Just finished reading the book "The Case For Christ" by Lee Strobel. It makes for a fascinating read for me. Not so much how true he puts out the case that it really takes more faith to disbelieve that Jesus is who He claims to be than to confess that he really is Lord and God come to die for us. But its really fascinating to see the dialogue that's exchanged between the believers and non-believers, and how sometimes when you're firmly fixated with a certain mindset, its impossible to see the other side of the coin.

And maybe that's the problem with me sometimes. Just sat down today for supper with Paul. He's got a major hearing coming up tmr, and I can tell that he's pretty worried. Guess he's really unsure what exactly he wishes to do with his future now. And with Joz and him still dancing that same annoying tune of "Pick-Me-Up-Then-Drop-Me-Again-Then-Pick-Me-Up-Again-Then-Drop-Me-Again", its pretty easy to see that he really is at a loss now when confronted with a future that was once steeped in opportunities and possibilities yet now fraught with uncertainties and closed doors.

We were doing some calculations and realized that I've been single for almost 2 yrs oredi. Man! Time certainly flies. Hahahaha... and I've already been a wuss for so long. With Xiying now attached to Shirong, and Paul probably getting back with Joz, I think its time I start making more friends and set the stage for me to get myself a girlfriend. Muahahaha.

Time I stop letting Grace and Andrew continue ruining my life. No point wondering if getting attached is gonna hurt her, Peng. After all, if she wants to run away from you, then just leave her alone. Move on, and finally get yourself a girl who truly loves you. Grins.

*damn*

Ah well. Who am I kidding. Who the hell would want to date me now anyway? Even Paul's gotta resort to going back to his ex. (Hehz...) No, Nut. You lost out again. Grins. Time to go running, lose weight, start getting my life back in order... ah... then the fish will start biting. and since I tell myself I'll only date someone I've known well for over 2 yrs, I better start expanding my circle of female friends to more than the current ones that I have... and move on to the more eligible ones. Muahahahaha...

But getting back to "The Case For Christ", reading it in tandem with some things happening ard me... really set me thinking. Been telling CK that we really need to brush up on the quality of BS in our cell. I can actually sound really profound when sharing while sms-ing. That's how bad our level of knowledge in the Bible has sunk. No doubt that knowledge of the Bible ain't the standard by which we judge true spirituality... but surely one needs to know who and what we believe, so that the God we profess is more than just a general lofty idea of a higher being. Secondly, Ruth's been asking again and again why she can't love God. And I guess its a question I always struggle with. But hahaha... on the one hand, she seems more bothered by the fact that she doesn't love God than me... which I guess might indicate that she actually loves God more than me. Grins.

She gave me her blog to read. And what struck me was how everyone seems to think they're the only one who is so depraved and unlovable. Guess one day when she grows up and has people opening up to her, she'll see that almost everyone feels the same way - that if we were to ever open ourselves up for everyone to see who we truly are inside, no one would want to have anything to do with us. Bloody hell, even I also have such thoughts everyday. That accounts for the many masks that I wear so well in most settings and places that no one knows what I feel inside, or who I truly am inside.

Reading the book has at least drawn me to one conclusion -

Someone once said,
"If He be God and died for me,
No earthly price too great can be
For me a mortal man to make
I'll do it all for Jesus' sake"

And that was my little stirring of the heart after reading the book. For me there never was any thunder and lightning when I received Christ. Yet again and again when I'm remind of what He did for me on the cross, and at Calvary... I'm reminded that everytime I do something to let Him down, those nails he bore were because of that. And such an awe of that kind of love compels in me a response that can only be worship.

Gotta give Ham BS early tmr. Weimin's timetable just got badly screwed up, and sometimes I get a little worried foi them. Ham's not exactly Mr Sensitive, and Weimin tends to be all gloom and doom. Trying very hard to tell myself not to kaypoh. Its their relationship, not mine.

Grins.

Time to go find my own.

On my own...