I ain't shitty, I'm pink

Its thursday. Another week has passed, and its turned out to be a pretty remarkable week. From Serene going up on stage to lead the response song at service, to having everyone ard me come down with a bad case of flu and sore throat, to my series of tests finally being over, and even to England winning 2 matches on the trot!!! Muahahaha.... even more amazing is that Michael Owen scored. One of those rare occasions.

Speaking of rare, I actually met up with Paul too!!! Hahahahahahaha... Yeah, we had dinner and had time to bitch abt how big a bastard each other is. Grins. Gonna miss doing that in a couple of years' time when he's too busy changing the diapers for his babies. Ha!

Had supper with Caleb last night, and Syl showed up later. And its really hilarious, cos she sorta confessed that with Johan being so nice to her and all, she finds that she's wavering, and sort of liking him back. Not that its any big news, since it was coming from 10,000 miles away, but it still yet again adds to the overwhelming mountain of stats that says if you like a girl, just keep plugging away being nice to her and she'll bite. Eventually.

Now I just need to get my hands on Michelle Chia's contact. Grins. I wonder if April's number still works... hmm...

Anyway, there was this really intereting question raised by my friend the other day, and I asked ard for a response. No one really gave a fully complete reply. But then again, there prob wasn't a real complete reply too. She asked what's the difference btw disciplining your feelings, and suppressing it. And I guess I was pretty intrigued by the whole thing, and the ramifications of that. Cos if (the answer ultimately touted) discipline only lends a rationale to the act, the ultimate act itself is still one of suppression. And if so, I guess suppression of your feelings ain't as bad as so many pple instinctively make it out to be.

Yet my question was then what sort of difference is there between suppression and denial? Between suppressing how you feel for someone whom you know is impossible, and the denial that it is still there, what's in between? I see guys like Aaron who can move on to Shirley barely 2 weeks after being rejected by Violet, and yet in one sense you can't fault a guy for moving on, can you? So what if he had waited 2 yrs instead of 2 weeks before going out with Shirley? Would that have made things any more acceptable? And if then he still liked Violet, does it mean he can't ever go out with someone else?

I see someone like Daoxing in my own tuanqi, carrying a torch for Serene for just abt forever already. Yet he's also liked lotsa other girls in the meanwhile. Like I was telling Syl last night, I wonder if he was suppressing his feelings for Serene then, was in denial, or was he just totally clueless? How would a girl feel if I told her I am courting her, but that she's the girl I moved on to because the girl I truly liked isn't reciprocating? Won't that make me an absolute bastard?

Hahahaha... I'm kindda like what Paul describes as an "old sneakers guy". I like old stuff. I like things "the way they were". Mebbe that's why I find it so hard to ever want to move on to a new relationship. I'd rather just not be attached again. Or else stay within the current circle of friends I have to look for someone. I keep talking abt expanding my circle of friends, but at 25 I guess I've more or less settled on a circle of friends I want to keep, and I no longer have the energy to make new friends. Not many, anyway. Enhan and Ruth are actually 2 pple I'm bothering with. Pretty surprising that I do, actually. Mebbe I still got what it takes, but pple nowadays just don't open up as willingly anymore.

Anyway, I'm really really really worried for Bernice. Just saw the new schedule for the Levite Ministry. With John the latest to step down from the ministry, I really dunno how she and Henry are gonna cope man. Hope they can just hang in there, since I'll try my best to be back from dec onwards.

Ah well. Back to my studies.

I ain't smelly, Nut. I wash. Grins. That's why my shit is pink. Muahahahaha...