Passion Week

So we enter into Passion Week. Starting with Palm Sunday, and a message on discipline.

3 out of the 4 people who know what’s going on tell me its time I learnt to let go. And today’s message seems to be God’s way of telling me the same. Funny how things work out sometimes. I remember one article I posted a long time ago in this blog, and the one line that always stayed in my mind said “The hardest part of love is letting go”.

How apt therefore, that Passion Week for me shd entail such an act of disciplining myself. As the dowager so succinctly put it, if He is willing, He will one day resurrect for me the dreams He wants me to now offer up.

That aside, its been more than a week since I lost my internet connection. Life finally returns to some semblance of norm now that my parents are finally home and I can stop straddling two houses. I crashed the car on wed night, but manfully faced up to the music with my dad. He had his two words to say to me, naturally… but to his credit he soon shut up abt it.

I went for the blood donation today, and gave 500ml!!! My first donation!!!! Hehz… it turned out to be really good fun, getting everyone to sit down together in the room and give blood, cheering each other on. Poking fun at each other also helped loosen the tension of the room as we stared the giant needle down and allowed it to go through us.

I remember thinking to myself the verse that said “He was pierced for our transgressions…”, then I think of how small that needle looked in comparison to what Jesus must have been looking at that night in Gethsemane when He told God “Not My will but Yours be done.” And I thought of my own apprehension at such a small needle… then was struck yet again by just how different and small my capacity to love is, compared to God’s.

How dare I, therefore, claim to love someone… when again and again I expose my own selfishness and self-concern. How can I ever promise to place someone else above myself, and promise to take care of her forever?

Ahem… again I digress…

Hehz…

Weimin’s 21st birthday party on Saturday. It was fun, and I think she enjoyed herself. I know I did. Grins. Man, she’s really grown up now, that girl. Sniff sniff. Hehz…. It was held at Venezia opp our church, inside the Singapore Arts Museum. Was a really nice and quaint little café to hold the event, and the crew were very helpful indeed. Kudos to the dowager for finding such a good spot.

Grins.

Man Utd thoroughly thrashed this pathetic little red club on sunday, winning comfortably by 2 goals to nothing. Tee hee. One of the most enjoyable nights I’ve ever had in Wineflair. Their latest innovation is employ the use of the karaoke instead of having a singer at the stage. Though I really think it is a better decision to make, we now have to endure the occasional enthusiast whose friends just don’t have the heart to tell them they shd surrender the mic instead.

After that my dear Simon sent me back in his BMW, that is due to be scrapped tmr… after this he will be without a car for a month until his new Nissan Sunny arrives in May.

I guess even after the melancholia sets in at night when I’m again back in my room, with the prospect of a futile struggle ahead of me, at least for now I can see plenty to give thanks for, plenty that I am truly thankful for.

I remember hearing this song at Liquid Kitchen on wed night… one of my all-time favorites… thinking to myself yet again just how cruel and ironic life is sometimes. I always saw it as a very sad break-up song. That night I suddenly saw it as a song abt shattered dreams. (Another theme recently that has surfaced very often in conversations with a few friends, all volunteered by them. Yet another of those not-so-subtle signs that God is now flinging into any path I take…)

I guess its clear enough from today’s sermon that the key word this week for me, is the word “discipline”.

Would that I am able to do it.