Its a new week, and hopefully I get to start anew. Afresh. Last week was a real bitch. And I for one really didn't know why. Guess the whole funeral thing got to my family, then to me. Its a negative energy that seems to pervade the air, infecting everyone who comes into contact. From my uncle's funeral, to pple in church still being increasingly pissed at each other, to even things like Weimin and Enhan quarelling... hehz... I still haven't found my 24 hrs without any bad news. And what more dramatic way to end the week than to receive news that Syl and Mark broke up... I guess that more than anything summed up what a bad week it was in all.

I feel really stupid sometimes. I allow pple to unwind their problems to me, but I'm like a sponge that just absorbs in all the negative karma, and end up getting depressed over something that's none of my business. Ah well. But part of that abject stupidity lies in the belief that since I care for these pple, it does in a way become my problem. I just need to learn how to keep a proper perspective, and not indulge in my depression.

Had breakfast with Henry on sunday morning. Think he's one brother I really appreciate. One of the few who really makes me feel better. I guess serving in the Levites Ministry would have been a real drag if not for him. As much as Bernice is a real help in so many ways, I still can't really talk to her that much. Mebbe cos she's a girl. Henry's return has really lifted me up. We're both still trying to find our way around in the world, and what to do with our lives.

I told him I feel there's a difference between having meaning in my life, and living my life meaningfully. My meaning in life is found in the fact that I have an eternity to look forward to, which makes living on this earth something that makes sense. Gives me a sense of meaning. Yet, so often, as I'm living each day, the things I do seem so trivial, that it seems almost meaningless. What the hell do I blog for anyway? The things I do - study, work, hang out with pple, talk to others... it sometimes seem so meaningless. Its like what they say in Ecclesiastes. Everything is meaningless.

Bah.

I think I'm gonna read the book of Revlations this week. I need to regain for myself my perspective of where I'm bound. To look forward, to press on towards the goal, as the Apostle Paul puts it. Mebbe then this week will be the better for it.